The Long Road Home

This short poem is basically the accumulation of my mental state over the past few weeks and months. I’ve been feeling a little rough to be honest, but only in the last two weeks or so have I really began to regain the will to feel better, the will to learn to cope with my anxiety. Over the past two years, I have tried both CBT (last year) and antidepressants (up until this April.) Neither of these worked for me and I think they to some degree, the medication especially, may have caused me to feel worse or atleast I would have felt bad anyway and the medication just didn’t prevent that. I don’t want to disrespect those two therapies, they can be vital and help a lot of people.  They just weren’t right for me. I am still looking for what’s right for me. I started with a new therapist last week and I’m hopeful. Nature however I think will always remain the best therapy, along with exercise and music. The following poem uses the reality of the landscape of my familiar journey home, on the longer local walk, as a metaphor for the journey of life. Yes there will be dark patches and dark thoughts and confusion, but there is also moments of beauty along the way, and the final destination of calm and joy is worth the struggle, even if the journey takes a longer route than expected.

The Long Road Home

On the longer road home,

Where I see rabbits more often

Than in any other place

And sometimes a pheasant,

I consider often

The structural integrity of life

And the meaning of bridges.

©Tadhg Ó Ciardha